When you really stop and think about it, it’s downright weird and even a little creepy that we decorate festivals geared toward children with fake human corpses. But never mind – when spooky season arrives, it’s time for some skeleton jokes and puns! And, to be fair, skeletons are technically educational: in fact, there’s one hanging in the corner of every science classroom, lab, or office of smart people in movies and TV shows.
For example: Did you know that we are born with approximately 270 bones in our skeleton, but by the time we reach adulthood, this number drops to 206? Yes, a bunch of our bones fused together over time. Now you know! Here’s another fun fact: The word “skeleton” comes from the Greek skeletonos, which means “to dry up” (like your bank account for your kid’s Halloween costume).
So, if you think about it, skeletons are pretty versatile. They serve as both learning tools and spooky seasonal decorations. If you can accept that logic, you’ll love these skeleton jokes and puns (they make perfect IG captions!) – no doubt about it.
The best skull jokes and puns
1. What is the skeleton doing during the ice hockey game?
Driving zam-bony.
2. Why is the skeleton so calm?
Because nothing can touch their hearts.
3. Why doesn’t the skeleton go to the dance?
because he didn’tBody Dance together.
4. What is the name of a skeleton without friends?
Skinny as a stick.
5. What plant does the skeleton like best?
Oracle boy.
6. Why can’t skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
7. What is the name of the skeleton that comes out of the snow?
A numb skull.
8. Why didn’t the skeleton laugh at this joke?
Because he has no sense of humor.
9. What did the skeleton order at the restaurant?
Ribs.
10. How do French skeletons say hello?
“good morning!”
11. What is the name of the skeleton that rings the doorbell?
Lifeless.
12. Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
No Body.
13. What did one skeleton say to another?
“You are dead to me.”
14.Why don’t skeletons play football?
His heart wasn’t in it.
15. Why does the skeleton go to jail?
Because he is bad to the core.
16. Why do skeletons fight?
Because he has a bone to pick.
17. What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend?
“Will you give me bone marrow?”
18. When do skeletons laugh?
When someone tickles his funny bone.
19. What is the name of a skeleton that goes to school but doesn’t do any work?
Lazy bone.
20. Why are skeletons afraid of the cold?
It sent shivers down their spines.
21. What is the name of the skeleton snake?
Rattlesnake.
22. How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
He could feel it in his bones.
23.Have you ever heard of the skeleton who dropped out of medical school?
He doesn’t have that appetite.
24. What happens to the skeleton that sits by the fire for too long?
He became extremely dry.
25. What TV does the skeleton watch?
A skeleton.
26. What happened to the pirate ship that sank in a sea full of sharks?
It came back with a skeleton crew.
27. What utensils does the skeleton use to make tea?
Bone china.
28. What is a skeleton’s favorite form of transportation?
A terror plane.
29. If Skull’s terror plane wasn’t available, where would he fly into?
There is also a skeleton helicopter.
30. What will the skeleton say when it goes out to sea?
“Voyage of Bones!”
31.What type of candy will send a skeleton to the hospital?
Jawbreaker.
32. What does the skeleton hate the most about the wind?
there is nothing. It goes right through them.
33. Why didn’t the skeleton rob the bank?
Because he doesn’t have the courage.
34.What is the skeleton’s favorite musical instrument?
A trombone.
35. What is Skeleton’s second favorite musical instrument?
A bone saxophone.
36. What kind of movies does Skeleton like to watch the most?
Spine-tingling.
37. Why do skeletons climb trees?
Because the dog is after his bones!
38.Who is the most famous skeleton in France?
Napoleon’s bones separated.
39. What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
“you suck.”
40. Who is the most famous skeleton detective?
Sherlock Bones.
41. What did the doctor say to the skeleton with a temperature of 103 degrees?
“Looks like you’re running the femur.”
42.What is Skeleton’s favorite rock band?
Grateful Dead.
43.What kind of fish do skeletons like to eat?
carpal bones.
44. What is Skeleton’s next favorite rock band?
Bone Jovi.
45. Why does the skeleton go to the dance?
Go meet the boogie people.
46. What is half the diameter of the skeleton circle?
radius.
47. Why are the skeleton students late?
He is preparing for the exam.
48. What do scrawny people use to get into homes?
Master key.
49. What do you call a skeleton hanging out in a coffee shop listening to indie music?
A hipster.
50. What do skeletons like to do most with their phones?
Get the skeleton.
51. Why can’t the police arrest the skeleton?
They couldn’t blame him for anything.
52. How does a skeleton know that another skeleton is lying?
He could see right through him.
53. What Spanish food does the skeleton like best?
patella.
54. What did the skeleton say while riding his motorcycle?
“I’m just a wild person!”
55. Why does the skeleton go to the hospital?
Remove his ghoul bladder.
56.What is the lie told by the skeleton?
A fibula.
57. What did the skeleton say to his wife?
“I love every bone in your body.”
58. What job on a construction site is best suited for a skeleton?
Skull Operator.
59. What room in the house does the skeleton like the least?
living room.
60. How did ancient skeletons send letters?
Bonny Express.
61. How much does an elephant’s skeleton weigh?
Skeleton.
62.What type of art does the skeleton like?
Skeleton!
63. What does the skeleton complain about?
Bone aches.
64.Why does the skeleton drink so much milk?
Good for the bones!
65. Why does Skeleton need to take acting classes?
He wanted the Shin Star.
66. Where do bad jokes about skeletons belong?
In the skeleton.
67. Why can’t skeletons fly over Area 51?
This is prohibited bone.
68. What kind of pasta does a skeleton like to eat the most?
Elbow Macaroni.
69.Who is Skull’s favorite female star?
Urna Thurman.
70. What do bones use to cut objects?
shoulder blade.
71. What kind of jokes does the skeleton tell?
shoulder.
72.What bird does the skeleton like?
Sea skull.
73. What did the skeleton real estate agent say to his client at the closing?
“The spine is on the dotted line!”
74.Why does the skeleton always fail tests?
He’s a dork.
75. What is the motto of the skeleton?
Eat, drink and scare!
76.What does the skeleton in Shakespeare’s play say?
“Tibia, or not tibia…that’s the question.”
77. What’s the skeleton’s favorite place in the mall?
Cinnamon.
78. What did the Labrador say to the skeleton?
“Come on, throw the dog a bone!”
79. What are the commonly used payment methods for skeletons?
Cryptocurrency.
80. Which movie stars a dinosaur skeleton that runs away and terrorizes people?
chest park.
81. Why doesn’t the homeowner want to have people over?
There are skeletons in his closet.
82. Why isn’t the skeleton jealous?
There was no jealousy in his bones.
83. What does the hard-working skeleton get from his boss at the end of the year?
A bone – us.
84. What did the skeleton say to the liar?
“I’m not bone yesterday!
85. What is the name of a skeleton with only one skill?
One move to flesh and blood.
86. Why is it so hard for clumsy skeletons to make friends?
He has no social savvy.
87. Why is the little skeleton’s mother always hanging around?
She is a skeleton helicopter parent.
88.Why did the skeleton decide not to go out with her noisy friends?
She tries to maintain integrity and essence.
89. Why does the skeleton want to go to the nightclub?
She heard it was a real hip.
90. Who is Skull’s favorite indie rock singer?
Bones Ivor.
91. What is the skeleton’s favorite fashion accessory?
Beanie.
92.Why don’t the skeletons go to the forest?
She knew sticks and stones could break her bones!
93. How do French skeletons say good night?
“good evening.”
94. What is the name of the skeletal lawyer who works for charity?
Kinbone-o.
95. What fruit does a skeleton like to eat the most?
On the pineapple.
96. How does a skeleton carve up dinner?
Use a boning knife.
97. Why do skeletons go to the butcher?
He wanted to put some meat on his bones.
98. Where did the skeleton keep her pet parrot?
In her chest.
99. What kind of gatherings did the Skull and Bones Society in the West Country host?
Bone Anza.
100. Why would a skeleton be elected president?
She is a natural leader.
101.What did the famous skeleton say?
“It’s bone on top!”
102. How does the skeleton feel the day after Halloween night?
exhausted.
103. What did the skeleton say after reading Stephen King’s book? it?
“That book is chilling.”
104.Why did the skeleton tell his classmates that he couldn’t go out?
He needs to prepare for the exam the next day.
105. What did Smokey Bear say to Skeleton?
“You can definitely stop forest fires.”
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