For some moms, getting their kids to help with the simplest of tasks can feel like an uphill battle. Let’s be honest, half the time, they don’t even do what they’re asked to do, so getting them to notice the waiting chore and take it upon themselves is a whole new ball game.
Mothers are caught up in the “invisible labor” of the household: necessary tasks that are often overlooked or underappreciated, or feel like they will never be completed if their mother doesn’t do it for them.
But one mom (@samkelly_world) took to Threads to share some of the ways she works with her kids to better understand the work she does and help them with their toughest task: grocery shopping.
“For over a year, I’ve been talking to my kids about the invisible labor of running a household, the meaning of ‘mental baggage,’ and examples in their lives and mine,” she explained in the post.
“I also teach them how to first notice what needs to be done around the house and then take the initiative to do it themselves without having to be asked,” she continues.
She went on to say that when she goes grocery shopping with her three children, ages 12, 10, and 6, she uses the opportunity for them to apply what they learn to real-world situations.
“I know you know what we usually buy at the store,” she told the children. “So I’m going to let you look around on your own in this section, and when you see the things that we typically get, like we’d ‘pay attention and do’ at home, you can… ‘pay attention and do’ Grab ’em store.
Now, I admit, as an adult, I don’t think I’d have a successful shopping trip using this method – I need my list, and I need to check it off as I go! But it turns out Sam’s kids shop more diligently than I do.
Sam shared that she was surprised that the kids didn’t “notice and catch” any of the “random crap,” but instead really focused on what the family really needed, or was missing, like kale and milk.
“It’s like responsibility and ownership of the task—trying to find ‘what we usually get’—supersedes everything else,” she explains.
She shared that this strategy lightened her mental load—she could focus on getting items for certain recipes while the kids took care of the staples.
Threads users applauded Sam’s idea. Many people shared how they have applied “note and do” with their own children.
User @imkeersten said: “We share all of our shopping lists on our phones so it’s not just me noticing something is low or outside in the house.” The kids can add to the list and my husband or I can Stop by the store on your way home to pick up what you need on your list.
“We started working on ‘note and do’ this summer and so far it’s hit or miss 😅 but this weekend one of them cleaned the toilet themselves and the other cleaned out a bunch of towels. I love it This grocery store idea! said user @theashleystinson.
Now, who’s going to test this on their next shopping trip?