A few months after my ex-husband moved out, we lost our 12-year-old golden retriever. When I’m down, it feels like life is kicking me; the entire year has been devastating.
At the time, my children were 13, 11 and 10 years old. Of course, I wanted a dog, but I knew I didn’t have the bandwidth to train a puppy and Starting my life as a single mom. I was already the only adult in the house and a dog was too much for me.
We settled into our new routine and things got less crazy after a year or two, but I still didn’t have the energy for a new pet. We would visit shelters and whenever a family member or friend got a dog, we would stop by and do a lot of dog sitting. Anyway, that’s enough… for a while.
Then my kids became more independent. When my oldest child graduated high school and my daughter got a job and started driving, I found myself sitting alone on the couch many evenings. There’s nothing better than having the entire evening to be spent as you wish. But on those nights, it wasn’t a man I longed for. That’s a dog.
This is when I knew it was time to add another pet to the family. Being a single mom with older kids means you probably have a lot of free time. You may only get a glimpse of your child for days or weeks. Your house will become quieter. Like, eerily quiet, and you’ll miss the sound of footsteps, drive times, family dinners, and movie nights.
If you don’t have a partner, there are only so many nights you can lie on the couch alone before you start feeling real Lonely.
so we finally There is a dog. My kids really wanted him but I knew I had found him for me. My kids will be gone in a year or two, but my dogs will still be here. Sometimes I go weeks without human affection, but my dog is always here to snuggle. Sure, my kids get the occasional hug, but I miss the closeness we had as kids. My girlfriends and I always hug after we get together, but that dog loves me so much it fills my heart.
I sleep better now that he’s here. I look forward to our walks and talking to him as soon as I wake up. We’ve made it a habit and he really makes every day better. Of course, nothing can replace my children, but having pets around helps fill the void. Pets are great companions and they bring a lot of joy.
I’m not going to lie, being a single mom with older kids can be heart wrenching. No one can prepare you, but getting a pet is, without a doubt, the most helpful thing I have done in my life to get through this time.
Katie Lives in Maine with her three children, two ducks and a golden retriever. When she’s not writing, she’s reading, going to the gym, redecorating her house, or spending way too much money online.
