This is my third consecutive presidential election with my two-year-old daughter. In 2016, I was a new mom to a toddler daughter, and I tucked her into bed that night, fully confident that I could wake her up in the morning by telling her that the United States had elected its first female president. In 2020, I took her now 6-year-old and her 2-year-old sister to a mask and promised them that I would vote for someone who would protect us and the imperfect country we love. Right now, I’m making sure my 2T Future President shirts from Target (the ones my oldest daughters wore when I voted those two years) are clean and ready to give to my third daughter, who is 2 this year. I am now voting again for a woman president and incredibly hopeful that I can wake them up on November 6th with joy and excitement comfort.
But I hope my 10-year-old daughter already knows that joy. Because I’m going to keep her up late on election night.
Election night in America is a big deal, and I don’t mean that for obvious reasons. It’s just one of those things you really need to witness. Learn about the Electoral College process, watch John King break down the odds with his interactive panels on CNN, and see American democracy in action.
Of course, now that election night rolls around, I have intense anxiety coursing through my veins. I don’t want my 10 year old to know about this anxiety, but I do think it’s important for her to see the whole process. My 10-year-old daughter, who votes with me every election, understands why this is important and excitedly asks me to calculate whether there will be a presidential election in the year she is eligible to vote. (Note, 2032 will be here.) She’s committed, and I hope she keeps it that way. That means the next step is to get it done on the first Tuesday in November.
“Our children live in a world where politics are very real. Whether we want it to or not, the world affects our children, so when we think of ourselves as the adults in our children’s lives, one of the ways we do that is we need them to understand world, what they know about themselves, what our family values are, and how do we prepare them to hear or see things that might challenge their (or our) perspectives or even make them feel scared or uncomfortable? Assistant Professor of Media Science, Boston University Dr. AnneMarie McClain told me, “If we want them to be open-minded, empathetic, respectful, curious, bold, and courageous, if we want them to truly consider the values we hold about important issues, then we need to show them how. Walk around.”
But I also wanted her to see the whole process. Learn what it’s like to vote in this country and understand why it’s so important. Some of these states are so close, they may have to take another look at the margins. How intense everyone’s emotions would be about how people were unhappy with the results, suggesting there was cheating in America. Elections bring out the best and worst in America—and I can’t shield her from that. Some of my friends have shared that they don’t want their children to be confused or upset after watching it, or trying to figure out why someone would vote for a misogynistic, unqualified dictator instead of a qualified woman with extensive experience. – But she’s seen it all. She heard the political chatter outside our house and she knew full well that America had never had a female president and it was bullshit. She understands each candidate’s policies and has made it clear that she believes “this is like the suffrage movement happening all over again.”
As McLean said, the kids have heard everything out there. “Issues that we may sometimes think of as ‘adult’ and very ‘distant’ to children actually still affect children, sometimes in very powerful ways; our children need to be prepared to face the world and Know that we believe they can,” she said.
So why not watch election night with my kids? Why not explain what happened the way I wanted her to know? Why not make sure that the news she will hear about the election comes first from her parents and then from the rest of the world?
I know we probably won’t get the results Tuesday night. I know our country is going to be in a weird limbo for a while, and we’re all shaking with anxiety and nervousness. But she and I will spend that night together just as we spent Election Day 2016 together—with hope.
