Finding balance with your partner can be difficult for even the most well-intentioned and communicative spouse. Many times, the responsibility for taking care of the kids, the kitchen, and the house falls on the mother (who usually also had a full-time job), which left her feeling stressed, overwhelmed, and resentful. But Sarah Biggers-Stewart, who posts on TikTok as @thebiggersthebetter, found a way to manage it with her husband, Tucker, by setting up “morning parents” and “night parents” The needs of children and families.
“It’s really as easy as it sounds,” she began. “I’m a morning parent, so I get up with the kids around 6:30 in the morning, make breakfast for them, brush their teeth, get dressed, comb their hair, and pack their luggage. It’s almost the same every day, except one day when we flip .
Her husband usually wakes up after about an hour, which is especially good because he’s recovering from end-stage renal failure and the rest is good for him. He took over from her, giving her time to get ready for work and after school.
However, around six o’clock in the evening, after dinner and playing, it was her husband’s turn.
“My husband takes the kids upstairs to bed. He plays, reads, takes a bath, brushes their teeth, puts their pajamas on, and then puts them to bed.
While he was doing this, she put on an audiobook and “spring cleaned” the house.
The aforementioned “flip” occurs over the weekend. On Saturday, she sleeps as long as she wants (usually 9 or 10) and fulfills her bedtime obligations, and her husband does the same on Sunday. They then resume on their regular “morning/evening” schedule.
“That’s great because psychologically the hardest part of being a sleep-deprived, exhausted parent is not that you’re actually sleep-deprived and exhausted, but not knowing when you’re going to bounce back,” she said , yes we feel that way. It’s not exhaustion (well, it’s not only Exhausted); the truth is, you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. “So it’s nice to know that this day is waiting for you.”
Biggs-Stewart went on to say that she also appreciates the flexibility of the schedule (if early-rising parents are available) Excellent Parents are tired or at night Excellent Got exhausted at 6pm and they switched) and since it’s so consistent it’s easy to know what to expect – this works for parents and children.
But perhaps most importantly, it gives both her and her husband time to focus on one thing at a time.
“Do you know how rare this is as a parent?!” she exclaimed. “You just have to think about one thing? It’s great for mental health.
Of course, let’s not ignore the exciting pleasures of irregular sleep. As someone who has been doing this for years, I can assure you that it truly is a miracle.
This may not be a system for everyone for a number of reasons, but it’s definitely worth checking to see if it’s right for you.
