As a parent, there is nothing more difficult than helping your child deal with bullying. First, your instinct may be to go into mama bear mode, but taking your anger out on a small child is unwise and frowned upon. On the other hand, many us Still don’t quite know what to do with bullies (spoiler: they don’t always go away after high school). What many well-meaning parents would fall back on us A phrase we heard growing up that sometimes makes us feel better: “They’re just jealous of you.” But we think TikTok founder Emily Ballesteros (@emilybruth) was raised on a more effective approach.
“I didn’t grow up with a ‘They’re just jealous of you’ mom. I grew up with a ‘It’s none of your business’ mom,” she begins, and we’re already enamored and enamored.
“they are Probably unhappy. they are Maybe not safe,” she continued, explaining her mother’s words. “they are Maybe something is going on at home. them Probably brought up. them They probably have some kind of inner dialogue that is actually negative and judgmental, and they probably learned that from somewhere and they’re just practicing it on you. them They may have ideas and beliefs that don’t fit with your life, so they resent you.
“As a result, I don’t accept anything Personally,” she said brightly. “Because very few things are personal. Someone might come to me and tell me something very personal that they don’t like about me, and I’d still say ‘Well, happy normal people don’t do that. I’ve never been right about that. Other people have done this. So that’s their problem; I’m going to move on with my life. It’s so tiring if everything feels like a personal attack! Because that’s how you end up with a victim complex. It’s like “poor me;” it’s all about me and almost nothing is about you! But find freedom in it!
We think this is also excellent parenting advice for a few reasons. Not only does it teach our children that they don’t have to worry about what others say (because even if they are the one being talked about, it has nothing to do with them), but it also sows the seeds of compassion and empathy. Maybe not right away (it’s hard to sympathize with someone being mean to you), but on reflection it provides the opportunity to think, “What if this wasn’t my problem but theirs: wow, that’s a sad way to live.” . It must be difficult for them.
This is also a good suggestion worthy of our reflection. Because it’s hard not to take things personally: we can only real Seeing the world through our own eyes. But if we can truly internalize that other people are doing the same thing, we can let go of other people’s baggage and walk in the world unencumbered by their unresolved bullshit.
