Kids say some of the ugliest things, but sometimes they’re not rude, But despite this, they still have the power to make you feel bad about yourself.
Kids do this to us all the time—like when my daughter reminds me to make a waxing appointment, she’ll say, “I’ve never noticed you have a beard before.” (Yes, you might, too, one day, you This little so-and-so.) There is no value judgment in this comment, it’s just an observation. but the kids also Doing this to each other can be difficult to navigate as a parent.
Layla Shaikley, who posts as @laylool on TikTok, recounted one such experience with her 4-year-old son that turned out to be a “parenting win.”
“My 4-year-old came to me and said, ‘Mom, someone said my teeth are small,'” she began. She noted that her first reaction was “Oh, well, everyone is different and that’s OK.” But something told her to persevere and take a different approach.
“I was like, ‘Hmm. That’s a really interesting observation. Why do you think that’s important to him?'” she said, before continuing, “Different things are important to different people. I wonder. Why does he care so much about the size of his teeth? But really, when it comes to teeth, the only thing that matters is that you brush them and take care of them. . And you brush your teeth, right? …so fun, that’s important to him.
Then she asked what was important he.
“This conversation is stupid,” she concluded. “But when you have a 4-year-old, sometimes you find that those frames apply to weird conversations or things that people say to your child that aren’t mean, but they’re a little weird and make your child a little bit Insecurity”.
That’s what we’re here for! It’s so simple, yet so wonderful. Because whether you are 4 years old, 44 years old or 104 years old, many times, what others say about you is more about you. themselves More important than who they are targeting, the sooner you know, the better. (If you haven’t learned this yet, now you can think about it: better late than never, right?)
Encouraging children to think about things that are important to them cannot be overstated. Because ultimately, it’s important to start thinking about our values. At 4 years old, our answers may not be clear, but it sets the stage for them to be more thoughtful through random observations and comments.
