Over the years and through the generations, many names have been used to describe a child’s overall personality traits. You may have heard of “Indigo Children,” or you may have been described as “energetic” or “creative.” You may hear the term “orchid child” thrown around a lot these days at parenting seminars.
While there are many reasons to avoid labels, sometimes they can be helpful. Identifying common characteristics between your child and other children can help you find better resources to nurture them to meet their personalities and individual needs.
The same is true for raising “orchid children,” who resemble the flowers for which they get their labels. Orchids are incredibly beautiful – they are one of the most popular flowers in the world. However, caring for them can be more challenging. They need the right conditions to thrive. They are more susceptible to changes in the world around them than most other flowers. Orchids require special care and a specific environment; orchid children are no exception.
If you suspect you have a small orchid in your home, here’s what you should know.
So, what is Orchid Boy?
If your child tends to experience and feel everything deeply, you may be raising an orchid child.
“Do you have a child who experiences very large emotions? Who can go from very calm to very excited, or feel overwhelmed in an instant?” Sidu Arroyo-Boulter, licensed professional counselor ) (@sensitive.parents) asked in a TikTok video. “Does your child seem to be particularly sensitive to sounds, smells, lights? You may have a highly sensitive child. Highly sensitive children are what we call ‘orchid children.'”
How to tell if you have an orchid baby?
Diagnosing a highly sensitive child is not the same as diagnosing anxiety, autism or sensory processing disorder, Arroyo-Bolt said.
“For a toddler, you might imagine what they were like when they were babies. A lot of highly sensitive babies tend to be very alert. They might be that person who doesn’t have anything, no tricks or anything like that to help them do that. This little kid.
Of course, as she points out, this latter type of vigilance is very common among babies and young children in general. So, what other “marks” can you look for in your child? According to Psychology Today, highly sensitive children:
- Showing “extreme” emotions
- Greater response to sensory input
- Notice subtle changes in clothes, rooms, and even moods
- more likely to crash
- Experience a stronger desire to control yourself and your surroundings
- act more cautiously
- Low tolerance for frustration
- Low tolerance for correction
- discoidal loss, corresponding pursuit of perfection
- Feelings are more easily hurt
How to better raise orchid children?
A label is only as good as the help it provides, right? Once you find out you have an “orchid baby,” you need to know how best to parent them. It’s not always easy. What works for another child in your family may not work for this child. Arroyo Bolt explained why this happened.
“They’re fragile. They’re beautiful. They require a different approach,” Arroyo-Bolt said. “We are often told, ‘Validate your children. Validate their needs.’ Say [and] Reflect their feelings. So, you might tell your child, ‘I know you’re angry right now. “I know how upset you are,” may escalate your child’s emotions because highly sensitive children are very close to their fragile emotions and feelings of shame, and when you reflect this for them, their feelings may be heightened. strong.
Instead of identifying the exact emotions you think your child is feeling, she suggests simply recognizing that the situation is difficult, but it will pass.
“Instead of saying, ‘I see you’re depressed,’ instead stay with your child and be present with them without necessarily reflecting on their feelings,” she advises. “Instead, say something like, ‘This feels really important. It’s going to be over soon. I’m here for you.'”
What’s the biggest way to help your kids get out of trouble? Make sure you are attuned to their feelings. Understanding their needs will make them feel safe and understood. “Regardless of age, what will always help your highly sensitive child is their relationship with you and whether your highly sensitive child feels emotionally safe with you,” Arroyo-Bolt said. Whether I feel at home with you.
